It is overwhelming to see what a fire can do.

Since 2017 I have been coming to California after the fires, and walking amongst the remains and taking images. I feel how deeply painful it is to lose a home. But it is the belonging of memories and things that are irreplaceable that are so moving. One can rebuild, but you cannot recover. Treasures of history from a lifetime, remains of just a standing hearth, pictures on a wall, a found mug or items on the ground charred. It literally takes my breath away as I stare in disbelief what mother nature can do.

I remember the first fires and the phone call at 3 am with my son. I actually hung up on my son for not realizing the time difference, only to have him call again and again and say he is evacuating. I remember sitting on my porch for two weeks listening to the radio and awaiting texts. I even went out in the middle of the night for a banana and cigarettes. And I don't smoke, but sat here in my home chain smoking in fear.

That year and all the ones that followed, I always found myself there within 2 weeks after each fire. Friends of my son losing homes, being evacuated, but coming back to the land. Here in New York, the Northeast may get a few storms but nothing the likes of this, and not repetitively. I wanted to bear witness and began documenting behind the lines. Driving up and down dirt roads I captured images where one of my son’s friend lost his home and his entire 80 acres of land. Devastation I had never seen before and so up close and personal.

These images leave you heavy in a swirl of devastating emotions just like being engulfed with the fire all over again. But there is beauty and in the end there is also recovery. A flower in the midst of charred ground, the green grasses and flowering trees emerging within devastation. I have much to photograph, but it is with love and huge respect for all those that battle this again and again and all those that work tirelessly to save lives and property. I am humbled and yet honored to come back to this place, so it is not forgotten just because the fire is out.