since the beginning of the stay at home policy... i have been watching my once hefty ,fully animated ,love of life cat...Poo disintegrate into a skinny , vulnerable version of himself.
for a bit he was still bringing me a chipmunk or bird.... but now he has really gotten worse.. lots of tests.. Cancer.. and not much more than i've already done can prevent the inevitability of losing him
our pets are like our family.. and especially now living home alone during a time of already increased isolation it is going to be so difficult to lose the extreme comfort and companionship of having him around....
but that is about to end.. and each day i try to get used to the idea.. sometimes strong. sometimes crying..... no way around it.. it is going to be a deeply sad for a time... but the best gift i can offer is to let him go in peace and with all the love i have to give..
in the midst of this sorrow and helplessness.. the other day i walked out back and found one tender , seemingly newly being built nest on the ground.. the wind was up the day before so i'm assuming it fell down... later in the day i found one more......what a coincidence or was it.....
i could only feel this so symbolic... a reminder.. that in life there is death.. in death there is life.... like the eggs of new birds that might have used this nest for hatching...
kind of like this pandemic..... it's been a harsh reality on so many levels.... the obvious and what is so undeniably understandable going on beneath the surface...
what i know?? I've survived many things.... in the midst of my greatest hardships i've endured.. found joy.... laughter and life.. and while i will soon say good-bye very soon to my precious poo.. i will find the laughter and joy ...because that is what we must do
